Somwhere in the middle

I've never done this before. And I'm not saying that in the coy way where a chick plays innocent in hopes of tricking a guy into thinking that she's not exactly the kind of girl that she is. I mean I haven't counter-posted like this before.

I'm not into "reading" all that much, so I stick to blogs. And today, I saw this, a fairly charitable look at what girls go through in realizing that they're just not that into the nice guy that they've been led to believe they should adore. I'm going to go ahead and agree that there's a confusing dance we female types go through trying to figure out a balance between what's good for us and what gives us butterflies, but I also think we know damn well what we're doing to nice guys the entire time, so there's no need for sympathy. My bigger point, though, is that we're not really on the hunt for bad boys, no matter how many times you hear a woman say that's what she wants.

I'll put it out there: I don't like "nice guys." I never have and I've never felt bad about it. I do like my man to be a bit of a gentleman, but sometimes a girl needs to be put in her place. Deep down, we're all just a big mess of crazy, and a nice guy is happy to be the doormat to any ridiculous whim or outburst. And, unfortunately for nice guys, there's something way too sexy about a man who'll take control of that situation and lay down the law (yeah, that's a double entendre). But, that doesn't mean that, in moments of low self-esteem (read, immediately after a break up), I haven't called up my go-to nice guy to help get my mood turned around.

And not in the sexual way you're thinking. I mean that. I can always call that guy, tell him what happened, and then count on him to tell me how wonderful I am, how the jerk du jour is missing out, and how beautiful I am, even when I'm sad. It's a guarantee. So, once Mr. Nice Guy has me picked up and put back together, I go on the hunt for one who keeps it a little more interesting and a lot less predictable.

However, this is not to say that I want a guy who plays at being an asshole. No, sir. That's a sure fire way to rope in a girl who likes a man with a little more chutzpah, to whom the nice-guy-in-disguise will eventually reveal himself as the opposite of a jerk, and then I'll make him cry. Happens every time. What I mean is, I want a guy who's rough around the edges but willing to chase me a bit, who might cuss in front of my mother and even at her if it's needed, who isn't afraid to sweep me off my feet or put me in my place, and who loves the food I cook.

At the end of the day, a lot of girls probably want to be the one who turns a bad boy good, but we all know that doesn't really happen. What most girls get is a handful of devoted nice guys whose hearts they break, and a handful of bad boys who break theirs, and then one who falls in the middle range somewhere that can keep things interesting without making her wonder if he really cares.